


you smell like rotting

by orphan_account



Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Genre: Dysfunctional Relationships, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-18
Updated: 2015-08-18
Packaged: 2018-04-15 11:51:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4605666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>cuil theory</p>
    </blockquote>





	you smell like rotting

**Author's Note:**

> cuil theory

o.

"Miki Sayaka is a nuisance," you say, because it feels good when you say it.

i.

"Miki Sayaka is a nuisance," you say, because it feels good when you say it. Kyouko gives you her decapitated head.

ii.

"Miki Sayaka is a nuisance," you say, and you go to look for her because you want to tell it to her face, because it makes you feel good and you've always liked it when she was in pain (look how much trouble you've caused me). You're insignificant, Miki Sayaka. You're a nuisance, Miki Sayaka. You cause me so much trouble, and you should just die, Miki Sayaka. But you can't find her anywhere, because she doesn't actually exist. A picture of her head lies on the ground.

iii.

You awake as Miki Sayaka. You start screaming as loud as you can, because this is worse than going to hell or even seeing Madoka die. You never stop screaming. Everything is bathed in agony. Oktavia von Seckendorff crawls out of your mouth.

iv.

"I'm scared," Madoka whispers as she cradles Miki Sayaka's head. Kyouko stares at you as the head melts down to skin to brain to bone. She looks down only to see you holding your eviscerated guts in your arms. Maggots crawl out of your rotting stomach, too disgusted to burrow themselves in the warm flesh as slippery as molasses.

v.

"Miki Sayaka is a nuisance," you say, because it feels good when you say it.

"I know," she replies. "I don't need to hear it from you."

You take out your gun and get ready to shoot her head off. Your hand twitches involuntarily. From the street, from across the town, your mother falls down the stairs and splits her head open. You can hear the crack and see the blood, and now you have no parents at all. Miki Sayaka sighs and looks at the gun in your hand.

"You're a nuisance," you say. "Pathetic. Annoying."

You hand her the gun. She shoots herself, and now there is a body, but no head. From across the street, from across the town, you can see your brother at the top of the stairs. The blood from her neck trickles across the floorboards. You pick up her head, and look at her face, and suddenly you realize how wrong you are, how bad you feel about this poor little girl who doesn't know how to do anything but destroy herself. You plead for her to come back alive. Your brother is crying now. You shake her head and yell at her to come back, come back for you and your dying family. You pick up the gun and carry her head across the street, across the town, and into your mother's apartment. Her eyes open, and she screams at you to stop it, put her down right now, let me rest and bury me in a grave. You can only hear your brother's laughter from atop the stairs. She screams and pleads again, but you only cradle her decapitated head in your arms as you watch him. The world turns upside down and she is screaming as her head rolls down the stairs. She is your mother. You are her child, you are your brother. She cannot see anything.

You wake up with a start. Miki Sayaka is laying in bed next to you, naked as the sun when the earth was born. You had a weird dream. You remember nothing.

"You're a nuisance, Miki Sayaka," you say, because it feels good, a refreshing breath of air in the baby milk of dawn.

Her eye twitches involuntarily, just as your hand does. You take her head off with your two hands and lay it down in your lap. Her headless body sits up from the bed and wraps its hands around your neck. As she kills you slowly, you do not make a sound. You hand Sayaka her head.

vi.

"Miki Sayaka is a nuisance," you say, because it feels good when you say it.

She goes to rip her own head off, but the moment she moves her hands her body shuts down, still as death and ancient bone. You are annoyed. Kyouko hands you an apple, but it slips through your fingers. You are reborn as a witch threaded in red spider lilies. Sayaka disapproves thoroughly. A crack echoes through the universe in defiance of conventional physics as cosmological background noise shifts from randomness to a perfect melody. Your brother stops doing his homework and hums along to the mellifluous spider string of sounds. Witches and familiars and soulless girls fall out of the sky as the sun and your existence engulf the earth and beyond. You hesitate momentarily and decide to pick up Sayaka's head one last time with your skeletal fingers. Entropy crumbles as you cradle her decapitated head in your arms and kill every Incubator in the planes of known and unknown existence. Your small apartment complex ceases to exist. You stumble under the weight of everythingness, and your nonexistent mouth opens up to cry out, and collapses around your body before blinking you out of the spatial plane. You exist only within the fourth dimension. You become God and place Sayaka's head on a mantel where the angels cannot touch it, because you love her and her dying body. You find Sayaka's rotting body and bone and rip her soul out of the container as the maggots eat away her disgusting, foul corpse in the red desert. You send her soul back to your apartment, where she can read your profiles of witches and girls until the universe reestablishes itself. She disapproves. Her disapproval sends ripples through the inter-dimensional void between life and death and all between and above. Your brother feels and begins to cry on the stairwell.

vii.

"Miki Sayaka is a nuisance," you say, because it feels good.

You go to rip her head off with your two hands. She laughs and says not this time. You go to shoot her head off with your gun. She laughs and says not this time. You go to explode her head with your bombs. She laughs and says not this time. You go to melt her head off with the sun burning in your hands. She gets sunburned, laughs, and says not this time. You scream and yell because this stupid little insect, this useless little bitch, won't die. You try to decapitate her again and again for years. Kyouko tells you to stab her in the heart, gives you an apple, but it slips between your fingers and melts into the knots of the earth. You tell her that it doesn't work like that, that this is what you need, what you need to do. You try everything. You slice her throat with a box cutter. You gnaw her bone down to dust with a garden knife. She laughs and says not this time, never again, you will never touch me. That's it, you think. I'm done.

You become God and Satan both. You reign over Hell and Heaven. You send Azazel and the Leviathan to rip her apart, her head as a prize. They come back with nothing. You disapprove and kill them again and again and again until they are in the plane of a universe beyond. You send every angel out to rip her apart, her head as a prize. You disapprove but do nothing. Your rule means nothing; it is not enough. Oktavia von Seckendorff and your pretty threaded lily witch come out of your two horns and long hair and four eyes. You reign over the universe, above and beyond. A black hole comes to rip Sayaka apart, but to no avail. It is not enough. You reign over all the existent universes in the world. You sew them together and play with them like puppets with guillotines, but Sayaka still has her head. It is not enough. You reign over the existent and nonexistent. What is yet to be created and what will never be thought of or come to mind or even be burrowed comfortably in the hollows of a small star cloud in all of the universes is already yours. The universe is out to get Miki Sayaka. But it is not enough.

You become the universe itself. You become all of the universes, the planes of existences and nonexistences, and you think and feel nothing, except you do. But the universe and universes crumble apart and split evenly into three halves until you nothing but dead. Miki Sayaka still has her head. Miki Sayaka is still a nuisance. You rip through the seams of the fourteenth dimension, and you can hear and see her. She is still laughing. She never stops laughing. She sits next to your brother on the stairwell, except there is no stairwell and he is a rotting corpse eaten by maggots and cockroaches. He is still crying. Your mother is still bleeding. They will not stop. They will never stop, so you say,

"Miki Sayaka, you're a nuisance."

She looks over to you, still laughing. "You know that's not true. I know what you really think of me."

She's right. She's always been right since the day she was born. You lay down in her lap and say: "Miki Sayaka, I love you." Your brother stops crying. Sayaka stops laughing. Your mother stops bleeding. Madoka stops whispering. Kyouko stops staring out you. Everything stops. Then the ribbon tied around Sayaka's neck is undone, and her head falls off. You scream. You never stop screaming.


End file.
